PnF Star Wars Deleted Scenes
by Sogo
Summary: Because somethings have to be written. Buford and Baljeet are lost in the Tatooine deserts, Beru likes modern art, and Phineas really needs to keep better track of his teleporter. (Sorry to those who tried to read this before. It's working now! I promise!)


**Sorry to people who tried to read this before. Something happened in the... You know, I'm not even sure. It went all wonky, and didn't bother informing me. Sorry about that.**

 **Anyways, this had to be written. Just some thoughts that have been bouncing around in my head. I may or may not eventually add to it, depending on whether or not I think of anything else to actually add.**

 **And, as per usual, I own nothing.**

Candace DID Grow Up On Tatooine:

Candace, Buford, and Baljeet trudged over the desert landscape in search of the droids… I mean, socks. They were looking for socks. For Lord Vader. Not the droids with the stolen Death Star plans that they weren't supposed to know anything about, anyways.

"Well, I'm lost," Buford finally said after a long period of silence.

Baljeet looked around for a moment. "I am forced to concur. Perhaps we should stop and ask for directions?"

"Ask who?" Buford shot back.

There was a pause as Baljeet once again took in the desert landscape. "Oh… right."

Candace rolled her eyes. "Come on, guys, it's not _that_ hard."

"But Candace, we could have been walking in circles for the past hour and not even know it," Baljeet protested.

"We're not walking in circles, and Mos Eisley's only another ten minutes away," Candace retorted. She pointed. "See? If you look closely, you can kind of see it on the horizon."

There was a long pause.

"I do not see it," Baljeet said.

"I don't either," Buford agreed. "You sure it's not one of those mirror-age things?"

"Huh?"

"I believe Buford is trying to say mirage," Baljeet supplied helpfully.

"No, no, it's right there!" Candace argued. "Trust me. We don't need directions or anything."

"For some reason, I feel like we're caught in some bizarre role reversal," Buford whispered to Baljeet, who just nodded.

"I heard that!"

However, they had reached the city fifteen minutes later.

Because It Had To Be Done:

People living on Tatooine may have been spread out, but one tends to notice when one's neighbor's house blows up.

So, when an explosion echoed through the air sending a dark plume of smoke into sky, Linda and Lawrence were quick to head to the scene.

"Well, I do hope no one was hurt," Lawrence said calmly as they surveyed the blackened and twisted ruins of the home.

Linda blanched as she recognized two shapes by what had once been the door. "Are those… _skeletons?!_ "

Beru stuck her head between them from where she had been sitting in the back seat. "My modern art sculptures!"

Next to her, Owen frowned. "I suppose it's a good thing you invited us over for pie."

"Yes," Linda agreed, staring at the wreckage. "Yes it was."

You Have To Wonder:

"So, I was wondering about your ship," Phineas said to Isabella as they flew off to try and catch the Millennium Falcon. "Is it possibly shaped like a chihuahua because you had a pet chihuahua that turned out to secretly be a member of the rebellion? Because I totally know where you're coming from."

Isabella's eye twitched.

"You know," Phineas continued, "that would also explain why you dislike the rebellion so much and refuse to be a part of it later in this film."

Isabella's other eye twitched.

"I'm just saying, it would really explain a lot… or maybe he died?"

It was only jedi reflexes that allowed Phineas to duck out of the way of the blaster bolt that singed the back of his chair.

Okay, he may have deserved that.

The Not-Exactly-A-Scene:

"Huh," Phineas mused, looking Darthensmirtz over before looking down at his own outfit. "You do realize there are going to be a whole lot of people claiming you're my father now?"

Darthensmirtz snorted. "Oh, please. The creators have only denied that million times. At this point, the only people who would believe that are people who wouldn't be swayed by this either way."

"...Touche," Phineas agreed.

There was a long pause.

"Besides, even if I really was your father, it wouldn't be revealed until the end of the sequel," Darthensmirtz pointed out.

"Yeah, and Candace would probably have recognized you," Phineas agreed.

There was another long pause.

"You realize we never really cross paths like this in the movie," Darthensmirtz commented.

"Well, we do sort of see you while you're frozen in carbonite," Phineas disagreed. "But I see what you mean. I think the author just really thought this needed to be mused on." He tilted his head. "And also comment on the fact that the creators really like teasing people about how we're totally not related."

Darthensmirtz looked impressed. "That's… actually a little bit evil."

"Well, as one of them voices you, I suppose it's honestly come by…"

So There _Was_ One Of Those:

"Sith face painting!" shouted a man at a table in the Death Star Cantina. "Sith face painting here! We've got Darth Sidious, Darth Maul, and various other not-necessarily-canonically-confirmed Sith!"

The cloaked green haired boy walking past perked up and changed course, making a beeline for the face painting booth.

This Is Canon And I Will Not Be Told Otherwise:

"You know," Phineas said, staring out at the last bus pod as it shot away from the Death Star, "our danger-activated teleporter would really come in handy right now."

"Your what?" Candace asked.

"Danger activated teleporter," Phineas repeated. "See, it occurred to Ferb and I awhile ago that some of the things we like to do back home have a certain element of danger to them. So we built a teleporter to take us just outside our home if we were ever in danger."

"That sounds useful," Candace frowned. "Why don't you have it?"

Phineas scratched his head. "Uh, I think we left it at Ben Kenobi's house after our last jedi lesson. Can't have it on you while you're practicing with lightsabers, after all. You'd never be out of danger."

"I hope it won't cause Mr. Ben any trouble," Ferb mused.

Tatooine, 30 minutes earlier:

"What the…" Obi-wan Kenobi blinked. "What just happened?" He looked around. "Hey! Where's my cloak!?"

 **THIS IS CANNON AND NO ONE CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE.**

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